Sunday, March 18, 2012

No homo!

Bromances seem like such a silly concept to me. It seems so silly that men are unable to have close bonds with other men because homophobia still widely exists. I constantly hear guys shouting out "No homo!" everytime they want to show some sense of emotion. But why do they feel as though they have to do so? However, I feel the exact opposite is true of women. I feel like there are many situations in which we are encouraged to act like lesbians, and receive positive feedback for it. We can walk down the side walk holding hands if we want to, and I tell my best friends I love them all the time without having to reassure everyone that I am indeed straight.  But men do not really have any comparable activities. As mentioned in the article, the closest thing they have to bonding is competitions to see who can out-man the other. And if men do engage in other bonding activities, they get accused of being gay, or immediately make it clear that they are not.

We often talk about all the double that women are caught up in, but not many take the time to think about how men are also affected by double binds. The author mentions in the article that men have to be different from women, be the dominant gender and be heterosexual but they also need homosocial bonding which is nearly impossible when they are always in competition to be the manliest and have the fewest feelings. I can't wait for the day when it is okay for men to not only have feelings, but to show them, and for it to be known that you can still be masculine while doing so.

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